Relations in the work team: three types of unpleasant colleagues. Behavior in a team: do’s and don’ts Communications with colleagues are mostly negative

Do you want to be taken seriously and given the opportunity to move up the career ladder? Hard work alone is not enough if you work in a team. ABOUT important details which need to be paid attention to, we will tell you in our material.

We often hear about successful "garage companies" that were created literally from scratch. But even such enterprises were created not by one person, but by a small team of like-minded people. What can we say about large offices, where everyone is discussed in the “smoking room” and where even the smallest features of behavior become material for gossip.

Every person wants to be himself, but at work he is forced to create his own image from scratch and deviate from the usual pattern of behavior. In a sense, this is a necessary evil, and any employee who expects career growth must put up with it.

But if you follow enough simple rules, then you can achieve your dreams without changing your own behavior patterns beyond recognition. Moreover, you yourself will enjoy fruitful communication with the team. Scientists at Harvard University have concluded that constructive conversation can stimulate the same parts of the brain as good food or sex. In other words, properly structured communication is both pleasure and success. What should be done?

1. Don't try to please everyone

There is rivalry in any team, and every employee is constantly drawn into one behind-the-scenes conversation, then into another. Form your own opinion and do not agree with everyone, just so as not to offend your interlocutor. In any case, someone will be unhappy with you. Choose allies from those people who want the best for the company, for themselves, and for you. Don’t create enemies on purpose, but don’t let loose your tongue either. Be polite, but defend your point of view. Then even those who hate you will take you into account and be afraid to cross your path.

2. Talk about yourself and let your colleagues talk about themselves.

A good conversation is when two people talk about their experiences and ideas. A bad conversation is a discussion of someone else behind his back. We are not talking about good and evil as such, but about those conversations that will help or hinder improving relationships with colleagues. Give preference to more personal communication, where each interlocutor has the right to tell his loved one about himself. In such a conversation, people exchange information that is more personally important to them and form friendships. In addition, you can learn a lot or pass on useful knowledge to a colleague. This will benefit the entire team and increase your authority.

3. Say hello

Do you like to sneak to your workplace unnoticed? Concerned about hygiene and don't want to shake hands? Get this nonsense out of your head. If you are squeamish, use wet wipes. But under no circumstances avoid greetings. The people around you should remember your existence and know that they also exist for you. Shaking hands is a separate art. Be sure to make eye contact and tilt your head slightly to show respect. Do not squeeze your colleague's hand, but if the initiative belongs to the other party, then you will squeeze your hand in response: this way you will demonstrate confidence and strength, although in general a handshake is not a competition.

4. Democracy is better than blind subordination

In a democratic society everyone has the right to vote. This also applies to the work team. This doesn't mean you have to endlessly argue with your boss. However, if you agree with your superiors on everything, they will not listen to you, because you will not receive any valuable comments. If an idea comes up and you are one hundred percent sure of it, try to voice it and don’t demand anything in return. This will remind you that the fate of the team is not indifferent to you. If a colleague has made or made a mistake and you can help, do not go to your boss, but try to come to an agreement among yourselves. This step will also contribute to the formation of friendly ties. If your opinion was not listened to and the common cause was at risk, feel free to tell your superiors about the problem.

5. Watch your appearance

Do you work in the most democratic office in the world? Does everyone dress the way they want? This does not mean that style and neatness do not play any role here. Human eye estimates in just 100 milliseconds appearance and creates the first idea of ​​a person. Don't go to the office like it's a parade, but always shine your shoes, cut your nails, comb your hair, shower and pay attention correct posture. Even the most brilliant person can lose his career prospects if his colleagues and superiors find it unpleasant to be around him.

6. Avoid closed poses

When talking to someone, try to be as open as possible. A straight back, straight shoulders and free hands speak of your confidence and honesty. Moreover, an open posture even affects your hormonal levels, making you feel more confident. If the interlocutor “closes” himself from you, do not follow his example, demonstrate openness, and he will most likely begin to behave according to the mirror principle. As a result, communication will be more productive and the atmosphere will be friendly.

7. Know your field better than anyone else and show curiosity.

Look at the most famous top managers and other business people. Tim Cook, Marissa Mayer, Warren Buffett, Jack Ma and other stars are ready for any questions, because they daily monitor news in relevant sectors of the economy and prepare arguments in advance, thinking about which side to expect the blow from. At the same time, the interests of successful careerists are not limited only to their industry. They are well erudite and pay attention to the most important news in science, sports, economics, and culture. Ideally, you should be able to reason soundly on almost any topic, and should have comprehensive knowledge of your industry. Sometimes one absurd thing you say will be enough to forever deprive you of prospects in a particular team.

8. Tell interesting stories

We have already said that communication should be as personalized as possible and even intimate in some sense. Of course, you don’t need to talk about your sex life at every turn, but even during a public speech or conversation with high authorities, you should try to create an atmosphere of confidential communication. Do you remember a story that could become an allegory and help draw attention to an important idea? Be sure to start with this story. Not every time you will guess what exactly the listener wants to hear, and not every time the case that is interesting to you will be interesting to others, but the speech will be more vivid in any case. It is very important that the story fits the general outline of the conversation and is witty.

9. Be a speaker, watch your intonation and diction

A person working in a team needs to study public speaking. You must be able to argue and make arguments. In situations where you need to demonstrate calm and confidence, phrases should not be confused and your voice should not break. Even themselves best ideas, voiced too chaotically, will remain unnoticed. This is another proof of the benefits of working in a team. It is communication with colleagues and constant competition that will teach you to be a speaker. As a result, you will be proud of yourself for winning arguments. If you don’t communicate with people, the skill is lost and any oratory challenge, no matter how insignificant, will make you doubt your own rightness. All public and generally all successful people, to one degree or another, master the art of public speaking.

10. Don't whine or be afraid to work hard

In any company, one of the favorite topics of conversation is hard life. The work is hard, there is little money, you have to get up early, you can’t get enough sleep, the children are sick, the bosses are tyrants, and so on. These stories will be heard in any case. But the less you talk about how hard your life is personally, the better. Talk about even the most difficult situations with a smile or at least without whining. After all, if work and life are a burden to you, what good are you? Our entire existence is in some sense meaningless, pardon the pun. Why remind yourself and others once again about boring and unpleasant things that have nothing to do with moving forward? Positive thinking, determination, hard work - all these qualities can cause envy. But it’s better to let them envy, but not consider him dull... The idea of ​​a successful person as a moneybag who has achieved everything and is now resting on his laurels is wrong. Read about how hard any of the billionaires who rose from the bottom of society work. With all our whining, we care about them like we care about the stars.

This test will help you figure out what place you occupy in the team, how much your colleagues value you, and how your superiors treat you. Choose one of the suggested answer options for each question.

Questions
1. You decided to attend a sports club because your colleagues work out there. How long will you be visiting?
a) you will persistently achieve better results;
b) it all depends on the mood;
c) won’t last even a week.
2. If someone tries to jump in line in front of you, what will you do?
a) express your dissatisfaction;
b) remain silent, but don’t miss it;
c) skip your turn, cursing your shyness.
3. Your colleagues began to argue about an issue in which you are well versed. How will you behave?
a) help your colleagues figure it out;
b) will not interfere until your opinion is asked;
c) you will remain on the sidelines because you are sure that no one is interested in your opinion.
4. On the street, a television correspondent asks you a question. What's your reaction?
a) calmly answer the questions;
b) you will only talk if the topic is interesting to you;
c) refuse the conversation.
5. The hairdresser suggested you try a new haircut. Will you agree to the experiment?
a) completely trust the master;
b) only if you come up with a haircut yourself;
c) stay true to your usual haircut.
6. At work, you have been entrusted with an important task, the implementation of which depends only on you. Will you be worried about this?
a) no, you can handle any task;
b) it all depends on what you have to do;
c) yes, you will try to refuse the task.
7. At what time will you schedule an important meeting?
a) early in the morning;
b) in the afternoon;
c) find out from your interlocutor when he will have free time to meet with you.
8. You have taken up something interesting to you, but you need to complete the paperwork. What are your actions?
a) work is most important;
b) finish your favorite thing to the end, and then get to work;
c) you will mind your own personal business.
9. You gave your favorite book to a friend to read, and he returned it hopelessly damaged. What will you do?
a) you won’t make a tragedy out of this;
b) demand compensation;
c) remain silent, but never give him anything again.

Instructions
For each answer under the letter “a” give yourself 1 point, “b” – 2 points, “c” – 3 points. Sum up your points.

Test results
Up to 13 points. You are an irreplaceable person in the team. Not a single important issue is resolved without your direct participation. You can easily cope with any management tasks. With a full workload, you still have time to give practical advice to those who need it. You are a leader by nature. You are often involved in new projects, as you easily navigate unfamiliar surroundings and quickly respond to changing circumstances. You have long gained authority among your colleagues, and you are in good standing with your superiors.
13-20 points. You have a certain amount of ambition, but lack focus. You will never refuse a new task, but you will not show much enthusiasm when completing it. Colleagues respect you, but rarely ask for advice. You are not an authority for them. No promotion is expected in the near future. You achieve respect and recognition not through pressure and speed, but through perseverance and loyalty to the company. Your efforts will be rewarded.
21-27 points. You can be described as a very insecure person. It is difficult for you to navigate in an unfamiliar environment, and communicating with new people unsettles you from your usual rut. You are content with the little you have and don’t even strive for more. Your colleagues often dump all the routine work on you. Most likely, you will remain in the same position for the rest of your life. The prospect of changing jobs frightens you so much that you will hold on to your previous job even if you are not paid for six months. You just need to change your life principles.

— Relationships in society: types, pros and cons
— Five types of team management
— Attitudes in teams. Pros and cons of friendship
— The importance of communication connections
— How to improve relationships in a team
- Conclusion

Five Types of Team Management

The type of company management is often divided into five components, where the boss does not interfere in the management of the team, does a lot himself and does not delegate his functions.

He aims to keep his position and nothing else. It is not surprising that the team does not like him, because he does not feel any concern for himself. In this case, production often suffers, because the manager simply physically cannot know everything, and since he does not resort to the help of others, he is practically marking time.

The second type of leadership is practically familiarity. In such a company, the manager takes care of everyone, sets a comfortable pace of work, but he is also not particularly concerned about the results, because caring about people sometimes involuntarily dampens them, and they sit on their necks. Favorites may also appear, which also leads to a decrease in results, since there is less demand for them.

A manager who sets tasks but is not interested in the human factor is also not very good in companies, since people simply work in them to their limits. The task may be assigned to an employee who does not have sufficient competence to deal with it.

Also, not everyone can withstand such a command style, since orders are usually not discussed, and dissenters face dismissal.

If a leader has a golden mean in leadership and psychological approach, then he achieves excellent results from the team, since he does not demand the impossible, but also does not give up in solving problems. This is convenient in those structures where the team is small and of different ages.

Not everyone is able to unite people with different interests and characters into one team, but especially gifted and charismatic individuals succeed. Naturally, such a leader must himself be a model of dedication and competence so that employees follow him.

The manager gives the employee self-confidence, allows him to gain more managerial functions, and develops him into a professional. Trust on the part of the manager and the reduction of supervision allows the formation of additional management personnel of the company who can independently cope with any of the company’s tasks.

Attitudes in teams. Pros and cons of friendship

Positive aspects of friendly relations in the work team:

1. Favorable atmosphere.

In many companies, management agrees to spend a lot of money on spending time together among employees, in order to create warm relationships in the team, making it a single whole with high work efficiency.

Friends brighten up gloomy work days and bring positivity into them.

2. Help.

Rarely in the entire team is there a person who is ready to selflessly spend his time and energy to help you deal with the work that you simply do not have time to do.

But a close work friend will definitely help you out in difficult times.

3. Awareness.

A person who stays alone in a team often suffers from a lack of information and communication.

So, having a friend at work, you will be aware of everything.

4. Warn of danger.

When something is wrong and clouds are gathering over you, who will be the first to inform you of the danger if not your like-minded person?

This way you can thoroughly prepare for the upcoming conversation, think through everything, how to react to an attack, and in some cases develop a strategy of action.

5. Reliable cover.

Friends will always cover you when, say, you need to leave early.

For example, in the event of an absence, a friend will say that you are away resolving issues with an important client.

Disadvantages of friendly relations in a team:

1) Ambiguous attitude of management towards friendship.

Most managers have ambivalent assessments of friendly relations in the team.

Management likes it when everything is quiet in the office - there is no gossip, but they also treat the friendship of employees with extreme caution.

When colleagues are friends with each other, they easily cover for each other, while hiding valuable information from management.

From time to time, management is forced to express their dissatisfaction by changing employees' offices.

2) Quarrels and low work efficiency.

Even the most inseparable friends are known to have arguments.

Then the desire to go to work completely disappears along with the mood, the person cannot work calmly at the sight of his “friend”.

3)Endless conversations.

Having a friend at work, you will waste most of your time just talking.

It is impossible not to notice if the size wages depends on the amount of work done.

3) Secrets.

If you have an argument with your friend, who has heard all your responses about the leadership and knows your opinion about them, then you can be sure that telling your secret will not be the slightest difficulty for him.

The importance of communication connections

The nature of communication between group members is of great importance for the formation of a favorable psychological environment and successful work activity. Sustainable communication connections allow employees to dynamically exchange information and mutually enrich themselves with the necessary information.

The psychology of relationships in a team in the field of communication has a decisive influence on the formation of value-motivational orientations and social attitudes of workers, their mood and activity.

According to research, up to 35% of the total volume of information received through the media, advertisements and posters is first mediated by individual members of society, and then transmitted by them further through personal contacts.
Based on the information received, experts believe that the psychology of relationships at work, the level of team control, its general condition and effectiveness depend on the skillful use and correct distribution of information flows in the group.

Psychologists recommend that managers organize additional breaks during the working day for 5-10 minutes. This will contribute to the formation of informal relationships among people. Such temporary losses will pay off handsomely by increasing team cohesion.

In addition, according to professionals, the psychology of relationships at work develops better if employees have a high level of compatibility, based on an optimal combination of motivation, type of behavior, ethical standards and values.

Experts also note negative interactions between people prone to dominance; they start real battles in the workplace for the position of leader. For hot-tempered workers, the psychology of intergroup relations advises choosing a calm partner.

And at the same time, all members of the team, without exception, must have the ability to tolerate, be critical of themselves, and be able to establish communication connections.

How to improve relationships in a team

A person spends only the first two or three years of his life separately from an organized group. And when the time comes to leave the house and go to our own kind, we begin to learn the basics of relationships in a team.

— Once you find yourself in a new team, try to establish relationships with your immediate management.

It is precisely this that is the buffer between you and the higher-ranking authorities, which, in case of urgent need, will be a defense, a person who will get a bonus or arrange a small scolding in order to prevent the righteous anger of the authorities themselves.

— if you hold a higher position, respect your subordinates and instill in them a sense of self-confidence, because with a strong team you can always achieve better results.

- if you have an extremely negative attitude towards the team, and you can’t not only understand it, but also find at least a couple of like-minded people, then it’s better to find another job.

— Be patient and you will be able to improve relationships in the team if you are honest with your colleagues.

Smile and joke - and this will definitely be appreciated in the team, but everything must be in moderation without vulgar jokes and constant cackling, the main thing is not to go too far.

- You can’t teach your boss.
If you want to object to your boss, do it in the correct form. Or maybe it’s better to remain silent altogether. But this is true if the leader is inadequate. If we are talking about adequate leadership, then he will correctly perceive even such an insubordinate remark.

— Respect your elders and listen to them.
If, behind the constant nagging, you still manage to recognize sincerity and a good attitude towards you, then be polite and listen carefully to the older generation, sometimes their advice is expensive.

Conclusion

Whether to make friends with colleagues or not, everyone decides for themselves. But whatever you decide, you need to strive for harmonious relationships in the team. Then, if necessary, your colleagues will always come to your aid and understand your position.

Relationships in a team depend on many factors, such as:

educating people,
— age categories
- universal human values.

A well-mannered person will always be able to establish relationships with colleagues. He knows where to remain silent and where to answer, and also does not forget about his responsibilities, without mixing his personal life with work.

The material was prepared by Dilyara specifically for the site

admin

You've probably encountered a problem when someone you know is unable to get along in any group. He changes jobs, but conflict situations arise again, then he is fired, and everything starts all over again. What are the reasons?

But there is another situation - when a person joins a new team. It is important for him to understand how to fit in, how to behave correctly in order to get along with new colleagues.

Work always requires communication. The ability to get along in a team is truly vital.

The ability to communicate with a team is developed from an early age. We take some of our skills from our own family, because this is our first experience of communicating with people. The rest are formed later, at school, college, etc. If there are persistent communication problems, it is important to understand the reasons for this.

Unfriendliness in the team. Main reasons

Let's look at the key reasons for quarrelsomeness in teams. This is important for understanding the problem and finding solutions:

Contrasting one’s own “I” with the needs of the team

There are individuals who, psychologically, seem to merge with others and are clearly aware of their interests. And even if they don’t try to help others, they at least don’t interfere with them, don’t oppose themselves to the needs of others. But it happens the other way around. A person who has stable conflictual relationships with colleagues contrasts his own “I” with other people from the very beginning. There is a persistent division between one’s own needs and the needs of others, one’s own benefit and the common one. If such a person depicted the team and himself on paper, then the person himself would be in one part of the sheet, and the rest in another. And there would be no connections between them.

Lack of ability to collaborate

Collaboration can often produce greater results than solo efforts. And almost every person can make an effort in a common cause, receiving their own benefit. For example, each employee contributes to the company, but in return receives a share of the overall profit or product that would not be available to him without the cooperation of others. In the opposite situation, a person is able to understand this in theory, but in life he does not know how to correlate his own interests with collective ones, and is not able to cooperate. Here arises main conflict. Such a person does his best to interfere with coordinated work, irritating others.

Using Conflicts to Strengthen Yourself

Often conflicting personalities They use confrontation to self-affirm their own importance and realize personal goals. This is a way of behavior that is used unconsciously. A person is not able to change it, even if he tries.

Uncooperative individuals are often unable to see their own shortcomings and problems, blaming others for conflicts.

Often, awareness of the reasons for incivility helps to understand conflict situations and change behavior.

How to get along in a new team

Now let’s look at a situation where a person finds his dream job: with a good salary, career growth, and similar interests. But this is only half the battle, because you still have to figure out how to get along in the new team and get along with your boss.

Your future coexistence depends a lot on how you behave from the first day of work in a new team. Some prepare for “war” ahead of time, while others don’t think about it at all, believing that a sparkle in their eyes and a beautiful suit are the key to success.

In any case, the first day of work with new people is stressful. You will have to get to know them, remember their faces, names, understand the intricacies labor process. Remain calm and remain confident in your abilities. Watch, trying to figure out who is who. Identify those who are considered by other colleagues and management. It is also important to notice those who like to “muddy the waters.” There is an opinion that women start gossip, but this is not true. Men are no less involved in this.

In the first days of work, no one expects high achievements from you, so you should not grab onto everything and try to complete the task faster and better than others. Take the time to become familiar with the work process and learn how the company is used to performing various tasks. This will show that you are an interested and serious person.

If at your previous place of work you were considered a professional and were taken into account, this does not mean that here too you should now give out advice left and right. Few people like “know-it-alls.”

If you notice that someone is called “Sanych”, and someone is even called by their nickname, this does not mean that you are allowed to do this. Familiarity does not lead to good things. Address new colleagues by their first and patronymic names or simply by their first names; only over time will you be able to move on to closer relationships.

Don’t be ashamed to ask old-timers for advice on something, to find out how best to complete a task. Don't be afraid to admit if something isn't working out. Everyone started and everyone has the right to make a mistake.

Keep your distance, remain yourself, then people will certainly appreciate it and accept you into their company.

Try to get closer to your colleagues, look for common interests. Non-work situations, including smoking breaks, also contribute to rapprochement. A great way to demonstrate what you have in common. If you don't smoke, then going to lunch with your colleagues is not the worst reason to get closer. Ask where there is a place nearby for a snack, where employees themselves are used to going for lunch, offer to go together. If a company holds corporate events, then it’s worth attending them, even if you don’t want to.

Don't let others get on your head. If from the first day you allow all the tedious and boring tasks to be pushed onto yourself, then this will soon become a habit, and you will often start staying late until everyone goes home. If someone asks for “help” with an urgent task because they are rushing to a date, respond politely but firmly that you also have plans for the evening.

You can’t please everyone right away; sometimes you will meet a colleague who dislikes you and turns others against you. There is no point in starting a “war”; you cannot win against everyone in any situation. It’s better to approach such a person and ask directly why you are not satisfied with him. Usually people don't expect such directness, it takes them by surprise. Of course, there is no guarantee that after this he will become your friend, but next time he will think first before starting a “war”.

Remain yourself for others. And in this case, the new place of work and team will bring you joy.

Let's look at 5 more main tips on how to get along in a new team when moving to another place of work. By following simple rules, you will establish yourself in the best light:

Acquaintance. This is the first and most important stage: how will you appear to your colleagues? When meeting someone, it is important to first say hello and then introduce yourself. In a small group, get to know each person individually. In this case, it is important to say the name clearly and loudly, looking into the eyes of the interlocutor. This is an indicator of honesty and openness. Be sure to ask the name of your new colleague, and if you didn’t hear correctly, be sure to ask again. If the team is large, then take the most prominent place and say hello to everyone from there.

Keep your distance. You should not share secrets with anyone from the first day of work. Try to pay more attention to the nuances of the work process. Moreover, while you do not understand what to expect from new people. But while maintaining distance, you should not avoid conversations, answer questions, and do not be afraid to ask them yourself.

Listen a lot. If you listen carefully, you will learn more about the colleagues with whom you will spend a lot of time. You shouldn't express your own opinion about someone. Even if someone complains to you about one of your colleagues, do not express an opinion about the situation.

Simple tips will help you properly organize your acquaintance with new colleagues and establish yourself.

Don't complain. Even at school they teach that it is not good to tell lies. If you immediately show yourself as someone who likes to have a heart-to-heart talk with your boss, then definitely no one from the team will respect you. And you are unlikely to get along there. They will begin to despise you, to consider you an outcast who should be avoided in everything.

Smile. A smile is rightfully considered a powerful weapon that helps to win sympathy. Try to smile more often when talking, when meeting the gaze of one of your colleagues. And then others will certainly be drawn to you, because a sincere smile never leaves anyone indifferent. Just don’t “sneer” on purpose, because there’s nothing worse than a fake smile. Better remember the funny moments, and then a sincere smile will not keep you waiting.

Now you know all the nuances about meeting a new team, ways to get along with colleagues. And if you follow these tips and rules, you will easily gain the trust of even conflicting “compositions”. In practice, after a correctly constructed acquaintance, it is enough to use 2 latest advice: smile and don’t snitch. Always and everywhere remember that people are different, each own character and features.

20 January 2014, 14:18
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